Here at Agama we have come together for a common interest or pursuit, the love or the desire to know more about yoga. So I am in my element, I love yoga. Underneath this seems to be something deeper, many of the people faced personal bottoms at home and just packed up and left. Over and over again I meet someone who, in whatever country they are from, either worked too much, lost a relationship or felt unconnected. Several sold all their belongings and have been travelling through south east Asia for many months, as nomadic spiritual seekers. Agama is roots of sorts, a month long program where friendships are made. Others are like me here for a rest and some yoga. But like many people it was personal crisis many years ago that brought me to my knees and then to yoga, so I understand their search.



Each day is full there are 2 yoga classes lasting anywhere from 2 to 2 1/2 hours, postures are held for 4 to 6 minutes each, sometimes the class includes a music meditation, this is my favorite, I love the lightness that seem to permeate my body during these meditations. Evenings are lectures lasting about 1 1/2 to 3 hours. After that we gather to eat and talk.



My back has healed so I am really enjoying the yoga, I do however have moments of being really restless, missing the running or the more vigorous yoga, I have run here but is is difficult as it gets dark early and the mid day when we are off is incredibly hot, also we have had tons of rain.

Thursday I attended a lecture held by the Swami on the topic of death and how to prepare for death, so that you ensure your launch into another world that is pleasant. He said that there is a hell and that many people think Christians invented hell to scare people, but that hell is a part of many religious and spiritual traditions, including Shamanism. He said that only the ignorant would choose to ignore this fact. He said there were many things you could do to prepare your "launch" after death. Unfortunately he didn't give us much more.

The Swami is a great speaker and he doesn't mince words, he is a times shockingly blunt and quite arrogant, yet in dealing directly with people he is warm and loving, he is passionate about what he is teaching and I am sure that is why, he is so dramatic, he wants to get his point across. He wants you to have knowledge and to make conscious decisions and he wants you to live a full happy life. There is no doubt he his grateful for the journey yoga has taken him on.

Fridays lecture was on a Kriya, or cleansing practice, where upon waking you drink a litre or more of body temperature water and then jump around and then vomit the water out. This practice is said to balance your Dosha, clean out mucus and toxins and even create mental balance.

Next week we learn about urine therapy...I don't want to tell you more until I have had the lecture.

Last nights lecture was held by Swami about Brahmacharya or sexual continence, or how to keep your vitality and not waste it. It lead to a conversation of the benefits of either celibacy or tantric sex, tantric sex sounds like a more likely choice for me. However as with most of the Swamis lectures it was long and left us only knowing that there is much more to learn. I am considering a Tantric 1 Workshop before I leave.


So far we have been taught only 11 posture but since we hold them for so long the class lenght is 2 hours.

It is so easy to meet and get to know people here most people have come here alone and are eager to talk. I am meeting people from all over the world, this week I met a guy from Iceland, he is the first person I have every met from that country.

Sunday is our day off and the school empties as everyone rushes off to have some fun and do some shopping, I am heading to a larger town in search of Tibetan singing bowls for my husband and in search of some food that will satisfy my need for something real or even cooked or for that matter not Thai, I am craving some different flavours.

As I enter the third week they tell my body is now purified and I am about the enter into emotional purification....sigh...I hope that goes okay.

Anyone wishing to see pictures can find me on Facebook I loaded some more last night.

Agama Yoga School

So the first week of school is under my belt, it has gone fast, we are learning lots about yoga philosophy and there is a focus on the Chakras and attunement with the universe. The teachers are incredibly well read, very bright and some of them have been studying here for 6 year. Because they are so well read they bring great examples into their analogies and most are really good story tellers.





It has been tough, choosing to do the fast zapped my energy and included colemas that we a mental block for me the first few I dreaded and had to force myself to go to, they were self administered thank goodness, but the first couple were awkward and uncomfortable. The last one was a breeze I felt like a pro, I even took pictures during it. And yes much like my husband has said (on occasion), I was full of shit.



Also I hurt my back and was in tremendous pain, thank god for Ibruprofen, I was crying one night because the pain was so bad. I decided though to still attend classes and to use a chair at the back of the room and it is working out okay. Just being around the energy of all people doing yoga helps to make me feel better.







My fast ended yesterday and I am glad I did it, the experience was challenging but I had really wanted to attempt one and thought this was the perfect safe place to attempt one. I lost almost 7lbs and have tons of energy. I also have not had coffee in 4 days....and feel okay. Whether or not I return to coffee will depend on whether or not I choose to come home to my old way of life, I hope that I do make some changes, I have a good life but I was tired and I need to find more balance between work and personal time, maybe just more time away, in fact I am booking a weekend away with my husband as soon as I return, so more Kama (pleasure) in my life will be a focus for me.







Spiritual practices require discipline, as discipline is one of the Niyamas or guidelines to living with self, doing the same thing over and over again requires discipline. It also takes disciple over a number of years, one does not become enlightened at their first meditation, nor do you realize much about yourself, it takes years of going inward to even begin to understand how you tick. The question they suggest we ask is "Why am I here?"





A yoga teacher back home once confessed to me that she is so busy and stressed that she no longer does yoga, she swore me to secrecy because she is so well known. I can easily see how that could happen and hope that I can maintain balance in my life. and stay connected with yoga, meditation and prayer once I leave here.







Today I attended a Spiral Mediation which is based on the Theory of countering the Yin energy of a full moon, which is Svadistana chakra, and is partially about sex and emotions. Here on the Island they have full moon parties which are massive and are about drinking, drugs and dancing, people come to the Island just for these Rave like parties. Agama school tries to counter this energy but creating Yang energy.





At the meditation we were lined up male/female by our stars signs and then spiralled a senior teacher was at the head/middle of the spiral and energy was moving through our arms. It was a standing meditation which lasted 45 minutes, it takes discipline to move through the distractions of the mind while standing for that long, the heat was incredible I had sweat pouring down my body. Since I was holding hands any movement would have distracted the men on either side of me so I stood perfectly still. Each time my mind wandered and towards the end it wondered quite a bit I brought my concentration back to the breath and I made it through the whole meditation. It really was an incredible experience. It left me feeling amazing but unfortunately I couldn't sleep because my energy was so good.,







I am not all yoga and meditation thought I must confess, I an having a blast, the people I am meeting are interesting and from all over the world, I am learning lots and making friends I sure I will see again. Saturday night a couple from Dubai rented a pick up truck and took about 9 of us into town, we went to an open market full of portable stalls selling food, it was neat to see the generations of Thais gathered around their kiosks, young and old gathered to sell food. I had mango sticky rice which is addictive some grilled veggies with a couple of grilled prawns that were caught that day. Luckily I love spicey food because everything is served with a side of spice.





Sunday some friends of friends came out to meet me and then I rented a motor bike and headed into town for some souvenir shopping and bought Thai Fisherman pants for myself. I am still very rusty on the bike and have to laugh when elderly women zoom past me with a grandchild or two on their bikes, I just keep to the side of the road and do around 30 or 40k/hour.





It is 6:45 am the first day of my second week of school, I am excited about what this week may bring, new people arrive all the time so not only is the school interesting so is meeting all these people, most of them are travellers and all are spiritual seekers, it is not chance that we are here at Agama at the same time, there is a reason unfolding for each of us.

So what am I learning

I came to Thailand for many reasons, both personal and professional, some reasons I shared with people some were kept private. Most of all I needed to recharge my batteries, I felt like an old cell phone battery, you know the one that will only hold a charge for a bit. That is how I felt, I could keep up with my life but soon I would be soo tired again, I knew I needed to get off the hamster wheel for awhile. I know what brought me to this point and I am okay with the decisions I made, but I needed now to recoup from the last few years and reconnect with Sheree.

So here in Thailand I am resting, I wish I was eating but I am on a fast right now and soon I start a brown rice diet, they tell us brown rice has the perfect balance of yin/yang and ask us to experience this miracle diet that is known to cure diseases.

I am re balancing my energies, it is great, each day I feel a little stronger.

Like most yoga schools, they are claiming to be the only one that is passing on the yoga tradition correctly, this is common; like religions the different yoga lineages all feel that they are they way, here at Agama they politely say it but they still say it.

I wonder if this fear is caused by the hard times they must of faced in the early days, a Romanian Swami teaching yoga in India, it must not have made him popular. In every spiritual tradition there are people who claim that they are the way, the path and the light, I call them false prophets, people flock to them and soon find that the path is a dead end. No one person has the path for others, the path is inside us all and can only be walked alone, we must dig deep and find out who and what we are, it is not easy. Yes many people will help us along the way but in the end our path is always going to be different from some one elses.

I am grateful for what I am learning here, it is in depth and very interesting, I may return for other courses, next time with my husband. But I will never follow one person as many of the people here do, I will always be free from those types of attachments to people. I am so glad that I came here happy and with such a full life, so that I can be objective.

I think I will always look at Swami as someone who taught me for awhile but I think deep inside we all have our own swami, that will guide us. I am looking foward to the rest of the course and spending more lectures with Swami V, he is bright, charismatic and very well read.

Thailand

I am in Koh Phagnon an Island in the South China Sea off the Coast of Thailand. I am amazed that I am actually here.


The trip was great, long, and for some reason I felt calm the whole time, I have always felt like I was meant to be here.

At one junction my plane was running behind and at first I was a little concerned about missing my next flight (I took 3 flights) so I just thought to myself it will work out and told myself not to worry and as I stepped off the plane there was an airport staff member waiting for me with my name on a sign, my first reaction was fear, had something happened back home ? But Bangkok Airline had wanted to ensure I would make my next connection so they sent someone to get me, I was promptly escorted to the check in counter on this cool electric car.


Exhaustion hit on the ferry from Koh Samui to here, after 3 planes, a bus ride and a 4 hour wait for the ferry, and a gravel just in case, I was half asleep on the Ferry.

In Koh Samui on the way to the Ferry I met a couple from Dubai who filled me in on stuff, like prices, taxi's etc.. a nice couple newly married. The woman had been here last year so was an expert. In the Taxi we sat in the b0x of a truck on benches, the taxi ride felt like the longest point of the journey.


I fell into bed the first night and slept for about 10 hours. The next day suffering from Jet Lag I orientated myself with the resort and......I decided to head into town.


d I decided to rent a motor bike, something I have not really ever driven before but I figure why not ? No time like the present to learn a new skill LOL. I got a quick lesson from a guy that barely speaks English but once he sees my handling skills his eyes open wide and he cautions me many times to go slowly.....I decided not to wear a helmet, sorry guys but I just need to be me. I went so slow that I was passed by everyone including their grandmothers. Motorbikes are the most common vehicle on the road, young, old, families, everyone is on them and generally without helmets.


So into the market I headed, it was neat, an abundance of small shops and stalls, selling everything, meat, fish, clothes etc...lots of massage places and restaurants. I .picked up a few items but was really too tired to get into shopping and bartering over the prices. Next trip to town I will sharpen my bartering skills. I will rent a motorbike again do some more exploring. Sundays I am off school and will try to do some touristy type stuff. Snorkeling is high on my list.


Thailand so far is a country so different then Canada, people for sure it moves at a slower pace, although I wouldn't say I see them as more happy. It seems about the same. I have always believed that happiness is a decision not a cultural thing. Rich or poor happiness is how you perceive the world around you.

There are no road laws that I can see very few stop signs and babies being held in their mothers arms while on motorbikes...Three to a bike is common here.

On the way home I got totally lost somewhere inland, so, there I was on a motorbike in 35 degree tropical heat, I could feel my skin burning. After searching for a map, someone who could speak English well enough to guide me, and finding a store that sold sun protection, I made it to my resort and wanted to do my first yoga pose, prostrating and kissing the ground, wait that is Muslin not Hindu, oh well, I was happy to be back.

Being lost was okay as the Island is not so big, but my butt was sore and I was pretty tired. I also had to maneuver the broken roads that in some spots were covered with red sand that must come down from the hills when it rains. There are skinny dogs every where running out into the road and tons of hills.



The guy who rented me the bike seemed happy to see my alive.

After seeing how meat and fist are handled here I have no problem not eating meat.

This is really an intensitve program 3 times a day 2 hours a day the first few days are lectures, then we are taught one pose at a time. Very slowly we build up to a series of postures, taught for their spiritual, health and physcial benefits. This morning was a lecture by Swami and then 6 warming practices. This afternoon is a lecture on the Chakras and tonight another lecture on what is yoga.

Full moon parties are common here, Beach parties with tons of dancing, music and drinking and some drugs, I have been invited to one but will bow out gracefully. It is too soon and I am too tired to attend a party, especially since I don't dring and/or do drugs. And I would have to travel there and stay for several hours, I would need an escape plan and can't figure one out. I will leave the Full Moon Parties to the young people.

The food is amazing rice soup today with tofu and lemon grass, I love eating fresh well prepared food, I am trying new things and loving it. I wonder if I will lose my latte and sushi addiciton while I am here.

Best of all I am videoing calling with Frank, we have skype and are making video calls, it is really cool, I think this is good for him especially because he was left behind and I know he had some concerns. He sits there shirtless with his earphones on looking kinda grainy. I love technology. I will have my daughter download skpye too and that way i can offset some of my missing her.

As I conclude this blog it is actually day 2, I learned one more pose today and had a lecture on why do Asana's there are 2 more lectures today. I had a massage and am booking a 4 1/2 day detox including self administered colemna's, my husband has on occasion told me I was full of shit so I guess I will find out. I figure to do it early while we are not doing intense poses.

Pictures will be loaded soon...very soon.

It is lowtide and so far I sit facing the ocean for all my meals. What an amazing adventure I am sure this will be. A 50th Birthday gift to myself...I am not yet 50 but will be in 2 months. Somehow I think this will be life changing in ways I can' t imagine.

This is my man

This is my man.... it is exactly what he looks like,
I look at his face in this picture and just know he is deep in thought, worrying about this or that.

He is complicated, and deep, there are layers to who he is. He can be stubborn at times. At times even dark. And at other times he is the kindest person I know. I guess we are all layered like he is.

I find him handsome, I always have. I have loved him practically from the day I met him, I kept waiting for him to love me too. I wondered if he would ever love me the way I loved him. This past year he has become very kind and gentle with me. I guess this was a deeper layer he was waiting to show.

The story I love to tell about him is this one.

One night we were at a church meeting. At that event was a guy named Reg. Reg would come and go, he struggled in life, he was dirty and looked like he slept on the streets. Reg usually showed up when he need some money, I always gave him what I could, why not. Then I would get in the car and find out my husband had given him money too. We would laugh at how he got us both.

But this night Reg started to cough, cough like he was about to spit out his lungs.

You know the kind of cough that makes people turn away. A murmur ran through the crowd. Just then, with out saying a word, my man got up and went to the back of the room, I thought he must be going to the washroom.

Where he went was....... to get Reg a glass of water.

This is the kind of man he is, deep, caring and full of compassion for his fellow man. I think this shows in his face. He is first a man, then a father of 5, a grandfather, a stepfather to one, a friend and a husband.

He would say I am his soul mate because I drive him nuts, a soul mate is not the one you sit passively with holding hands in peace. A soul mate can push your buttons, rub your raw edges of and more.

I think he will miss me while I am gone, but I know for sure I will miss him.

All Set ?

So the question I am most asked these days is "all set for your trip" and truthfully I have been mentally set for it for ages, I met Swami V almost 5 years ago and knew then that I would one day travel to Thailand to study with him, I have never doubted this moment would come.

Spiritually I am ready too, I am exhausted...I work hard and the last several years were filled with a tremendous amount of personal stress...my soul yearns for some quiet time. The stress changed me and I needed to change but I am ready to rest now....to rejuvenate my soul....I know I deserve this trip.

I am not packed (sigh)....I am waiting for my husband to find the suitcase, he stored it somewhere and can't really remember where, but is sure it is around and he gets annoyed at me when I ask about it...I will give it one more day (maybe two) before I head to Winners to replace it.

I have half waxed....bikini line done.owwwwwwwwwwwwwww....face hair on Wednesday....sigh

My feet are done, looking pretty and ready to peak through sandals.

I am still wondering about a bathing suit, I have my one piece black, slimming one, but I am contemplating a 2 piece...after all no one I know will be around, and it will be very hot there....I have looked and looked and keeping changing my mind.


Shots and papers are in order, I almost forgot to get my Visa for Thailand...whew


A visit with my Grandmother just in case something happens either to me or to her, I needed to tell her I loved her.

I am stocking up the freezer with meat for my man...something he can BBQ...little labeled packages from the Butcher.

I have reviewed with my teachers what to look for when they walk in the studio..toilet seat down...no socks lying in the entry way...sniff the air for smells of cooking. Dogs tucked away and not licking and loving our students.

I need to buy something for the trip, I still suffer from motion sickness and there is a lot of motion on this trip.

I am considering Breathe Easy strips for the trip....I snore and am hoping these might help... I use them in an unconventional way, one on my nose 2 on my mouth to keep it from falling open LOL..these are for the plane...I have ear plugs, an eye mask and a neck pillow...I am hoping to sleep on the way to Hong Kong at least.

I need to download Skype so I can talk to my husband cheap, no doubt I will miss him and doubly no doubt he will miss me. Feel free to drop off food for him....and of course feel free to nag him on my behalf...LOL what will he do without female advice.

So I will clean the toilets and bathtubs this week and I think then I will be "all set"