Courage to Change

I’m in my 50’s now and a lot older than most of you, but I feel young at heart, I have energy and I am always trying new things and accepting new ideas. For me, this is the fountain of youth, constant change, new experiences and new people. 

Yesterday I ran into an old friend of mine and she is very very ill, with an undiagnosed illness. She seems to be fading away and they don’t know what is wrong with her. I remember the first day I met her, she was my new boss, young, very attractive, she wore this fur coat like it was an old sweater, she drove a nice car and had a very successful husband. She seemed to have it all, at ae time when I had none of the above, I was just a kid starting out in life, wondering what my next steps were. It seems like it was just yesterday that I first met her. 

I share this with you for a couple of reasons, life is short, it really is, here I am in my 50’s and my friends are getting ill, one of my best friends has Parkinson’s, another prostate cancer, last year 2 of my male friends died of complications associated with type 2 diabetes.

  I am not trying to be morbid, I am trying to shock you out of your complacency. That’s right, you are just sitting around thinking you will do this or that, but time is ticking and you need to live your best life now. Get moving, get going on those trips, read those books, take those courses, run those races. Whatever your dream is, starting moving towards it, there is nothing sadder than looking back and realizing that life just zipped by and now you are older and unhappy. We all know some older people who are bitter, they didn’t grow spiritually, they didn’t live to their potential and now they wait for the end to come.

Just last fall I took my husband to emergency for what we thought was an enema and we discovered he had aggressive colon cancer; he has battled chemo for almost 8 months, as well as the complications of having an ostomy bag. 

Let me tell you this, when all this is ove,r we won’t be sitting safely on our asses, we will be taking on bigger challenges, running longer distances, creating new programs at the studio, maybe dancing naked in the rain, but we won’t play life safe. We already have our first trip planned we are going to Spain to do the pilgrimage, something that my husband is powerfully drawn too. Next summer we will either cycle the Cabot trail or train for an epic trail race

Maybe you are in your late 30’s or 40’s, sit quietly, and look back, where did the time go, how did your kids get so big and then ask yourself this, are you really happy, is this your life as you would like it to be  ?

Change doesn’t have to be huge, maybe it’s a hobby or a new running goal, maybe you want to play the piano or learn to surf, whatever you are thinking of just do it (thanks Nike). 

I believe that most people are unhappy because they fear change; it takes courage to change to put yourself out there, to take on new challenges. You may fail, and if you do so what, I have failed at many things, in my earlier years of sales training, I was taught that the more no’s I got meant I was getting closer the next yes.

Here is a great quote that inspires me. Print it off and paste it to your computer or mirror, or hand right it in your journal, read if often and never give up trying to find that life that inspires you. You are worth it, you matter and never forget your kids are watching you and they will learn from your example. Words are empty, actions speaks much louder. Set yourself free and watch your children grow to their potential. The seeds of love, change and courage you sow now, will create the future generation of your family. 

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, “I will try again tomorrow.”

Mary Anne Radmacher

Give up waiting until you are thinner, richer, the kids are older, etc…these in the end are excuses, take little baby steps towards your desired life and watch how your life unfolds, a journey begins with the following, a decision and then action on that decision.

Right now my husband is in bed, my dogs are at my feet and I think to myself, how grateful I am that I risked what it took to get here, a second marriage, a new and very different career, a new way of living. None of these came easily, there were tears, fears, and in fact sometimes I was so scared I wanted to leap back into my old life.  I head to bed now knowing that just for today I did the best I could.

With Love,

Sheree xo

Didn''t Buddha have a belly ?

I’m not a fan of diets, simply put; they are like putting a band aid over a wound that needs sutures. Yes, I know you will lose weight but how much more are up going to put back on? And, how is this going to make you feel ?

If diets work, then why are you going on another diet?

If I were to look back into my own life I can see many reasons why I overate, but rarely was it because I was hungry. I have eaten for loneliness, stress, sadness, confusion, habit, happiness etc…the list is endless.

I am the fittest now I have ever been, I am amazed at my strength and love how it feels to be fit, and I am also the thinnest I have been in many years. If fact, both my wedding dresses would be too big now. I have come to this place by not dieting. by giving up on old notions that I just needed to diet to lose weight. I ask you this, is the world flat? No, of course not, yet it was a belief of the time. We are always discovering new ideas, new ways of thinking, and yet we cling to the outdated belief that diets work. They don’t, it is a billion dollar industry that pays heavily for advertising to make you believe you need to diet. It’s an idea which is rooted in your subconscious mind so deep you don’t even know it is there.

A friend once said to me if there was a magic fat loss formula, Oprah would be thin and would be raving about it on her show.

Weight loss begins in your mind, it’s a journey into getting to know yourself, you think you know yourself but probably you don’t. You have created an outer self that puts a mask on to the world, and you have bought into this creation, but trust me it is not you. You are probably better than the self you have created. This disconnect is part of the problem you are uneasy and fill this dis-ease with food.

One of the things I know is that I am not a number on a scale, there is no value in this number. I am way more than a number, I am a mother, a wife, a lover, a teacher, a friend; I am a person who gives a lot and takes very little. I am strong, smart and funny. I am also on a spiritual journey, a journey that sometimes seems bigger than I can handle. Can all this be boiled down to a single number? One number that either makes me feel good or bad about myself. I think not.

More and more these days I see how I need to align my life with my spiritual values and this includes what I eat, how I eat it and how I think about myself. I have seen how brutally hard I had been on myself.  Somewhere along the line I had become a thing, something that was measured in value by its weight and physical attractiveness, and in truth neither makes me an attractive person.

What attracts you to people? Kindness, love, a great sense of humor, patience, a kindred spirit, isn’t it true that you find these values attractive in others, so why not develop them in yourself, become an attractive person by being a little more patience, be kind, compliment others and cultivate loving relationships.

So here is my Mother’s Day wish for you. I wish that you would love yourself as you are right now; I hope that you will be gentler on yourself in the next year and that you realize your deep inner beauty and begin to share this with others. I want you to stand naked in front of your mirror every day and tell yourself you are amazing, do this until you believe it, until it is so ingrained in you that you head out the door feeling like you can conquer the world.  I would love if you would stop talking about your weight, don’t they sell meat and other products by weight? Is this what you are, a product?

Slowly begin to align your eating with your values, eat whole foods as much as possible, eat enough to sustain you but not so much you feel stuffed and tired after eating. Food should energize you not make you sleepy. Eat slowly wither by yourself or with family and friends, enjoy the time eating as a ritual of communion with yourself and others. Avoid the foods that are addictive to you and find out where your food is grown and how it is grown. Begin to nurture a healthy relationship with food, it is not your enemy.  Be grateful for it.

Here is a quote by Marianne Williamson that I love, I ask you to read it often, to print it off and tape it to your mirror, your fridge, and your computer screen.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Happy Mothers Day,

With Love,

Sheree xo

P.S. didn’t Buddha have a belly ? LOL